Couple Embrace Fatherhood Through Adoption from Foster Care

Five years ago, in August of 2020, Charlie and Max adopted their sons, brothers Jaden and Tristen, in a virtual adoption. With all their friends and family around them, the boys are finding their stride both socially and academically. Max and Charlie are proud of their sons, now 12 and 10, as they are both finding success in school and with friends.

‘The boys have worked really hard to get to where they are. They put in the work more than anybody. They said, ‘This is who I want to be’ and we were just lucky enough to help show them how to get there,” said Max of the positive strides Jaden and Tristen have made.

When the boys first came to Charlie and Max they had some significant struggles and each was in need of more of one on one attention. They have since overcome those challenges and have fostered a strong sibling bond.

“The second one is hurt or needs something, the other one steps up for them. They are each other’s biggest allies and that’s something that we work really hard to foster that we’re all a family,” said Charlie. 

Charlie and Max feel grateful to have a lot of family nearby surrounding Jaden and Tristen with aunts, uncles and cousins. The boys have also grown close to the caring staff at their elementary school, who worked closely with the family to support the boys. In addition to this network of support, Charlie and Max help to balance each other out with their respective parenting styles with Charlie’s nurturing approach and Max’s abilities to identify and support important boundaries for the boys. 

“I want my kids to have the emotional capacity to handle when you don’t get something you want and to be able to emotionally regulate through the feeling that they didn’t get something,” said Max. “You also have to be flexible about what boundaries mean as they get older and we both recognize the importance of a second chance.”

Since Jaden and Tristen moved from rural Routt County to Denver, Charlie and Max have had lots of firsts with the boys such as their first trip to a big museum, the zoo, and an amusement park. The family stays active together and enjoys hiking and biking as well as going to art walks and farmer’s markets. Jaden and Tristen are also active in sports and enjoy soccer, football, baseball and gymnastics. They also love road trips as a family with their two dogs, visiting many states and even swimming with manatees in Florida. 

‘If you’re signing up for this, then you’re signing up for caring for a child… [and] you can’t compromise on that,” said Charlie of the advice he gives to others considering adoption from foster care. “It goes so fast. It’s gone so fast.”

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